Hope

Isaiah 40:25-31
Do you not know? Have you not heard? The Lord is the everlasting God, the Creator of the ends of the earth. He will not grow tired or weary, and His understanding no one can fathom. He gives strength to the weary, and increases the power of the weak. Even youths grow tired and weary, and young men stumble and fall; but those who hope in the Lord, will renew their strength. They will soar on wings like eagles, they will run and not grow weary, they will walk and not be faint.

What hope this gives to those in search of something to hang on to. For awhile I have been searching and wanting more from the life I have been given. I have a wonderful and beautiful wife, and two sweet, smart, and handsome kids. We have a good home, roof, meals, entertainment, all of that stuff people want in life. Still I search, I have floated from job to job, met and overcome small challenges here and there, but still there is something missing. I have subjected my family to a lot of......... well let just say useless crap. I do however believe my search is coming upon something true and tangible, something with grit, and meaning.

I have all the while been in acceptance of our Lord, Jesus Christ. I am born again through our Lord, and have never denounced that. At times I have drifted away, sometimes more than others, just dropped out of site, from the Christian scene, now however I feel comfort in coming back to my faith. I am understanding a little of Gods plan he has for me. I do believe He talks to His people even today. We have all read stories in the bible were He spoke out loud from the heavens to His servants, or from a burning bush, or in a vision or dream. Now that the word has been written and is complete, I believe He is speaking to us through that. Also through some servants in our lives today, such as a gifted communicators in a pastor, or Christian author, a Christian mentor, or sometimes through our spouses. Now don't get me wrong I am not saying I hear His voice, or I saw Jesus and He, "said to do such and such." No, I am not hearing voices or seeing visions, don't get me wrong, I think that would be pretty cool, but I do understand now things I read, and things I am listing to on occasion.

In what I have been searching for, I believe has finally come and grabbed me by the neck and has a firm hold on me. Ministry. I have talked with my wife, (which is most important), I have been praying and continue to do so. Now I am registered for school, to start my education again, ( I am far behind in some areas), though my sites for now are set on racking up credits and God willing to attend William Jessup University. Now I am looking at a good year and half, or more before this happens, and we all know that a lot can happen in that time. ( I think the best would be for Jesus to come back, but I am just saying...........) I feel good about this, I pray that this is the road Christ wants me on, to serve, to teach, or to counsel, I don't know, and am not really picky about it, Ministry is what it is, it is about God, His glory, His honor, His cause, not mine, O how I want to ingrain that in my head and most importantly in the place where my pride is. I so much want to lose this handle that is on me (pride). It is such a burden, but I trust in the Lord, I have confidence in Him to break me down, to pull me down, and build me back up in the form of a man of God, a man that puts Christ first before anything else, a humble man.

I believe we are on the right track for the reasons, He has cleared the road for the first part, (starting school), He has given me a wonderful woman in my life, that supports me and has put up with so much ugliness and is still around,(what a gift), He has also blessed me with a wonderful family and friends, and most importantly He is with me in my heart, my mind, and my soul. O how I love Him, and praise His Holy name.

Folks I guess I am writing this for the reason of sharing, sharing hope, allow others to see when we finally break our ties with worldly things, and allow Christ to be first, things happen. Doors open, your eyes opens, your heart opens, most importantly Gods plan and purpose unfolds even more, and to be apart of that, is a feeling like no other. If you are searching, if you don't have a clue where to look or go, just stop, pray, read, and listen. As I am learning in the teachings of Moses, when we wander away from what we know, and end up in the desert, sit by a well and let God fill you with His purpose. Well all I can say is " fill me O Lord, drowned me in Your love, in Your word, for Your plan, for Your purpose, make me full, so I may water others with the knowledge of Your word."


Heavenly Father, to come before itself is such an honor, to worship You with our prayers, with our lives lifted, is an honor. Father I ask to be filled with Your word daily, to be replenished with Your glory and grace, to have the power to share Your word with others, never tiring of it, or being scared to do so. Father, I lift up all who read this, all who share this with others, I ask for Your mighty healing right hand to touch all, fill those who You select, and bring those who You adorn with this knowledge to speak of You at all times, for all occasions. I give You my life, use me as You want, give me the knowledge I desire, but more importantly what You want to bestow, I give You my praise, I give You this day, I give You all that I have, for You alone are worthy, I pray in the name of Your son, our Lord and Savior, Jesus Christ,
amen